We're Not In Kansas Anymore

I wonder how Dorothy actually felt when she came to that realization.  We all remember watching Judy Garland walk around, holding Toto, stunned by Munchkin Land.  And right off the bat she knew that geographically she wasn't where she used to be, but they never touch on how she dealt with culture shock.  From everythying I saw, she took it all in stride, after all, she got to bring her dog with her.

Ah the dog.  Man's best friend, or so I'm told in my culture.  One of the first things told to us was, "People here don't treat dogs like we do.  Get ready for it." So you hear it, constantly, and you try and brace for impact, knowing that it is coming.  And it starts slow, maybe a kid throws a rock at a dog, or boots one back, keeping them at arms length with a stick the whole time.  So far, nothing had amounted to what we would consider actual abuse.  I was feeling pretty good about things.  If this was a bad as it got then bring it on, this was not as bad as I thought.  I didn't think hard enough.

Last week I went to Salima on Friday, we don't have the Peace Corps bank here and that is the closest one, so I took a night in Salima.  Whenever I get back from a trip, the first person to say, "hi" is the puppy.  She belongs to my neighbors and is about 5 months old.  One of the people at my neighbors is Ifa (I think that is how you spell it) aka- crazy person, the puppy belongs to his little brother.  Puppy stole a fish (all 2 inches of it, maybe, if it was big) from the pot while it was cooking. As punishment, crazy person, lights one of the other fish on fire, open puppy's mouth, inserts fish, and proceeds to hold puppy's mouth shut. 

When I first got back I thought she had rabies.  She had lost a ton of weight, not that she had a lot to begin with, and was drooling everywhere, she can't swallow her own saliva.  I've tried everything, rice, pasta, fish, soy pieces, protein powder, milk, etc etc etc. Nothing.  So yesterday I decided to survey the damage, clamped her between my legs and held her mouth open.  I think about half of the mass of her tounge had burned away and her mouth was sloughing off decaying tissue and it keeps forming a ball behind her front teeth.  I have disected things that didn't smell this bad. 

And there is nothing you can do. No vet, no supplies, no IV drip to re hydrate her, no way to tube her and put somthing in her stomach. Nothing.  I'm not used to feeling this helpless when it comes to my animals. All I do is hold my breath and wait to see if she shows up each morning.  I don't think she has eaten anything in 6 days. 

Please don't think that everyone here is like that though, Benson and Henery and everyone I have talked to are mad with him.  No one is happy with it.

And to the list of things I am not happy about you can add, "Price for Labor".  One of the reasons to go to the bank was to get money to pay people for supplies for my brand new garden fence, grass, bamboo, etc.  Then I had to pay Benson for labor.  Boy, did I screw this up.  First, we didn't discuss a price before hand, second I didn't ask anyone what is right for day labor, third, I just paid him and didn't ask about it. Benson said 4000 kwacha and I flinched a little but I said ok.  Lated I was talking to Henery and he said that at the most it should be 200 for a full 8 hours of work.  Yup, got really ripped off by my neighbor and friend. 

So how does Dorothy feel about culture shock. Shocked.  You keep hearing, "You will see abuse, you will see abuse, you will see abuse." And you imagine senarios, but nothing is like real life. 

Getting to Mbewa I was so happy! No one was saying, "Azungu!" or following me everywhere asking for 20 kwacha like at the market.  I felt accepted, I let my guard down.  Never, ever forget, you are the azungu, you are rich, it doesn't matter that you really can't afford to throw away an extra 4000 kwacha.  If someone loses their cell phone in the river, you should expect to hear about it.  I just didn't expect to pay for it. 

I guess I was being naive.  You think, not in my village, they've had volunteers for 4 years.  They should know everything comes through Peace Corps and I can't just give money out. Wrong. You are white.  Peace Corps or not, you can pay for it.  And if someone thinks they see and opening they will take it, even friends.  Not trying to be bitter, just a bad couple days.  Sorry, I'll be perky for you later. The spot of light in the week? Henery's dog had her puppies, 3 days old and adorable!  Yes I have pictures, no worries.