Advice, and Hardships

I think I am at the point where most everyone I know is aware that I am going to be leaving for Malawi in the next month.  This has led to the most amazing outpouring of advice I have ever seen.  I think this is mostly due to the fact that everyone I know has traveled outside of the US...I haven't.  That is not to say I never go anywhere.  I have seen most of the US, been all the way to the tip of the Florida Keys, and slept on more floors than I care to remember.  When I was a baby we drove from Alaska to Florida but since I do not have a stamp in a passport from that, I don't think it counts.

I am not claiming to be a traveling savant, and everyone knows this, so advice has been about the first things to do when you get somewhere, safety tips, how to keep luggage safe etc.

And it's not that I'm not grateful but the tips, however, are coming from people who hole up in resorts as soon as they touchdown in country.  Their tips are about traveling, not living.  Travelers want to live the same way they do now, just somewhere else.  Livers (not the organ), actually LIVE!

Example:

Traveler

"Oh Muffy you're back! We missed you at the club this past week. How ever did you find Mexico?"

"Why, Dash I turned South in Texas! Hahahaha! The worst thing happened though, the bar ran out of Pina Colada mix!"

"Muffy, surely you jest!"

Liver 

(once again, not the organ, although from the sound of it, were this Muffy's liver I'm pretty sure it would sue for separate custody) 

"Dude! You made it back!"

"No kidding, the doctors say it isn't Malaria and shouldn't be too life threatening after the next week, oh yeah, the cactus spines should work their way out in a year or so.  I'm just glad the camera is showing signs of life."

I guess what I am trying to say is pick your sources well, Muffy and Dash wouldn't know a hardship if it came up and slapped them on their cashmere clad butts.  But I can't say I'm a whole lot better.  Currently the top of my hardship scale has been trying to keep a certain little mouse from eating a hole in my backpack to get my trail mix.  My method was to wake up every 5 minutes when I heard him gnawing at my pack and make some vaguely human sounds threatening his existence and wave my hand in an attempt to ward him off.  Ultimately, I fell asleep and failed and the Marmots moved in, they took the entire bag...furry little vermin. No trail mix for a 7 day backpacking trip, yup, that is my hardship.  Oh well, at least I know enough to know that Muffy and Dash would not be sources for advice of any kind.  But this seems to be the only local advice I can dig up.  To make matters worse, I keep hearing about people taking longer to come out of culture shock than others.  

This could take a while............